Reflection

Deuteronomy 8:1 (MSG)

1 Keep and live out the entire commandment that I’m commanding you today so that you’ll live and prosper and enter and own the land that God promised to your ancestors.

Jeremy and I had the luxury of growing up in the same city. It makes it easier now for us to visit family. We enjoy the back and forth. Every time we make the trip, we make sure to hit up our old hot spots and reflect. For example, when we park outside our parent’s home, we would recall moments when we would sit in the car, for hours in the night, dreading leaving one another. Then there’s our favorite Cambodian restaurant near our old church. Growth definitely took place at thatchurch. I discovered what I was good at, and my life was never  the same. And how can we forget the people we met…? Key pieces to the puzzle that spoke life over us as we moved closer to our destinies. We wouldn’t be where we are without them. 

However, there are memories that were not so pleasant. Every time we cruise back, Jeremy would laugh over the bus routes he would take every day to his past jobs. And the horrible dish washing gig I pushed him to pursue where he almost lost his life. (insert face palm emoji here) Or the moments when we would fight. I would worry about our future together, because of our financial state. I would question, “God, you sure you want me to marry this man?” Hahaa .. 

Even though there were up and downs, we loved Lowell. We were comfortable. That’s why I was completely dismayed when God told us to leave. 

Deuteronomy 8:2-5 (MSG)

2 Remember every road that God led you on for those forty years in the wilderness, pushing you to your limits, testing you so that He would know what you were made of, whether you would keep His commandments or not. 3 He put you through hard times. He made you go hungry. Then He fed you with manna, something neither you nor your parents knew anything about, so you would learn that men and women don’t live by bread only; we live by every word that comes from God’s mouth. 4 Your clothes didn’t wear out and your feet didn’t blister those forty years. 5 You learned deep in your heart that God disciplines you in the same ways a father disciplines his child.

My transition to Boston was a lot tougher than I thought. Jeremy lost his job, I got into a car accident, we were forced out of our first home, I then almost lost my job, we were almost forced to abandon our second home, I lost trust in people, I didn't like my (newer) job because I was anxious all the time, which in turn, made me want to quit entirely. 

But God told us to stay.

Being present is always a work in progress. I am getting better at it, it's easier in this season, because I like where I am now.  I see purpose in my job; I adore my home; Jeremy is at a place where he is thriving; we love each other (more); we are a part of a community that is supportive, and I trust God more.

Deuteronomy 8:6-9 (MSG)

6 So it’s paramount that you keep the commandments of God, your God, walk down the roads He shows you and reverently respect Him. 7 God is about to bring you into a good land, a land with brooks and rivers, springs and lakes, streams out of the hills and through the valleys. 8 It’s a land of wheat and barley, of vines and figs and pomegranates, of olives, oil, and honey. 9 It’s land where you’ll never go hungry—always food on the table and a roof over your head. It’s a land where you’ll get iron out of rocks and one copper from the hills.

Jeremy and I love to dream. It’s honestly one of our favorite things to do. Before, we were less doers and more dreamers. Now, we are finally in a place where we are pursuing what God has placed in our hearts—and doors are opening. My goal is to be more confident in Him as we move forward. We are blessed and we are favored, because we believe in a God that is for us. I don’t take any season in my life for granted because God was there through it all. As He speaks and directs our paths, we know He is faithful to fulfill His promises. 

- mal